assertive brave feedback gain self-knowledge honesty Timid

What personality trait did Abraham Lincoln, Mohandas Gandhi, Mother Teresa share? Each of them was born with a naturally timid disposition, yet they all found the courage to stand up for their beliefs in a very public way that made significant advances for human rights.

A Timid Nature -

We’ve all experienced moments of timidity, but there are many of us who experience it on a daily basis. Some have made their peace with what they deem something they were “born with”. They have learned to appreciate the positive things about being introverted, such as being careful, approachable and having a calming effect on the people around them. They’ve chosen careers that are well suited for their innate ability to listen (therapist, journalist, business consultant) and to work in solitude (researcher, writer, editor, computer programmer).

At the same time, extreme timidity can be a painful experience. For those who constantly dread social events and feel tense during occasions that others find enjoyable,  there are several things that can be done to overcome this type of isolation:

Understand what causes people to be timid.

Internal: Having a genetic sensitivity to certain stimuli and/or an ability to adjust to new people or stressful situations

External: Having overprotective parents or coping with abuse or bullying

Find like-minded people. Use a chat room or other web-based means to find people or groups of similarly shy or timid people. You’ll find out you aren’t alone, and can learn coping strategies from each other. Once you feel more comfortable with using these coping strategies on the web, the same tactics can be taken to the street.

Work with a therapist. Look for someone who might use Cognitive Behavior Therapy and/or help you use positive self-talk to overcome debilitating timidity when it’s necessary for you to speak up and be heard.

Remember that there’s nothing wrong with being shy. There’s something to be said for being a good listener, for being careful and deliberate and for thinking before you act. Being quiet and alone is often necessary when coming up with a new concept or mastering a skill. When you take your time and do it your way, you could end up writing a book, starting a movement or inventing software that could change lives or even make this planet a better place.

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